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Episode 260: Hello, Heretic
Welcome to Towers of Midnight! Don't worry, Emily references the Da Vinci Code for the second week in a row. We talk about the cover and prologue, including how Mat Has Never Held a Bag Before, Lan Rhymes with "Man," There's Warging Now??, and Toilet Spoon.
Episode 261: TikTok Empath Energy
In ch. 1–3, Rand enters his Wellness Influencer era. We also talk about getting Bubbled of Eviled, Perrin's Pointless Crossroads (a recurring theme), Torture Junior's Throuple, and Double Shielding.
Episode 262: Go to Therapy, Mr. Stag
For ch. 4–6, we have problems with fictional men, including Gawyn's Incel Behavior and reboot of CSI: Tar Valon; Galad's KKK Era; and Perrin's Leadership Hypocrisy. We also have problems with the real men doing construction outside our house: apologies for the noise!
Episode 263: I Love My Ugly Son
For ch. 7–10, we talk about Lan's Minion, Buford; Neald's Queer-Coded Joie de Vivre; and Grady's Denied Time Off Request; and we bid farewell to a real one, Lopin. Also, welcome to Sedona, Arizona.
Episode 264: This Is My Fight Song
Ch. 11–13 are short, but we find a way to work in all the following discussion topics: Magicians, how Elayne's Pregnancy Was Written by Men, Rand's Jesus Robe, Appropriate Public vs. Private Behavior, Darkfriend Vision, and Min's Birdbrain.
Episode 265: Näeff
For ch. 14–16, we talk about Three Girlbosses and their Psychological Warfare, Flat Characters, Black Tower Volleyball, the Horror Story that is Rand's Brain, Forsaken Trading Cards, and Anything for Hubby.
Episode 266: The Elayne/Farquaad Similarites
"Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make." Ch. 17–19 get us talking about Code Brando, Berelain Said Boobily, Something That Is Nothing, OUR Amyrlin Seat, and Brandon Sanderson's straight guy heroism.
Episode 267: Mom Said It's My Turn at the Front of the Phalanx
There's a lot to discuss in ch. 20–21, including Vagina Mirrors, Ethics Boards, the Slippery Slope of Magic Nukes, how Single Women Are an Invasive Species, and, hey, Whoa, Balwer Isn't Just a Secretary?
Episode 268: Defund Paw Patrol
You want to know about ch. 22–24, you say? Well, they're all about Sally's Exploding Bones, Good Old Chub, Chance Boy Himself, Weird Uncle Mat, and Hysteria in Tel'aran'rhiod. Also: What About the Sheep?
Episode 269: There's Always a Jack the Ripper
Ch. 25–27 are disappointing to say the least. First, Rand faces no consequences for his crimes, but don't worry; according to Min, he's done nothing wrong. Then Perrin has the same epiphany for the 98th time. Berelain's boobs corrupt Galad. And the Hall of the Tower, as usual, is swooning.
Episode 270: Get in the Purple Zone
Welcome to 2024! For ch. 28–30, we're talking about Big Boy Vitamins, how Telepathy Is the Obvious Answer, Rhyming Perrin, Letting Galad Be a Side Character, and the Most Bizarre Scene of All Time. Also, are Grady and Neald, like, SO hot now?
Episode 271: The Most Man
Discussion topics for ch. 31–33 include: Chekhov's Abyss, Final Girl Ituralde, Respawning Trollocs, the Dragon Reborn's Walk with Christ, Our Favorite Monarch, and Gawyn and Elayne's Folgers Commercial (you know the one).
Episode 272: Perrin's Ted Bundy Strategy
This isn't the trial of the century, the year, or even the minute, but it's a trial. For ch. 34–35, we talk about Dannil the Danimal, Mr. Integrity, "Bad Apple" Byar, the False Good/Evil Dichotomy, and ask: Where Are the Lawyers?
Episode 273: The First Canine Fridging
RIP to a (arguably the only) real one. For ch. 36–38, we talk about how Perrin Is a Mary Sue; we accompany Egg to a Work Meeting; someone floats on the ceiling Mary Winchester-Style; and we discuss the fantasy Ethics of Killing.
Episode 274: Perrin's Feelings Exhibition
Despite the title, ch. 39–41 are action-packed (though sadly there is no battlefield kissing). Discussion includes: We Need More Explosions, Getting Right with God, IKEA Pack-It-Up Forges, Galad's Deprogramming, and Who Is Nakomi Plaza?
Episode 275: King Virgin and Queen Slut
Who wants to bet on whether this title ends up censored? For ch. 42–44, we talk about Feelings Impermanence, Marriage Bumpers, Prince Loser, the New Kardashians, and Failed Nostalgia.
Episode 276: Hashtag Love Wins
Ch. 45–47 are great for representation: representation of insufferable politicians (Elayne), men who wear unnecessary disguises (Galad), "cool" nerds (Androl), men who hate the club (Perrin), and people who should just be murdered (Mazrim Taim, Tuon).
Episode 277: Babies Channeling
You know, like balefire, from their eyeballs? Like laser vision? Anyway. For ch. 48–49 we discuss how Everything is the Aiel's Fault, Rand's Mega Sperm, Asmodean Moiraine, and the Cowboy Lightbringers.
Episode 278: The 9/11 Episode of "Bones"
For ch. 50–52, we talk about Elayne's Bobby Fischer Political Move, her Pet Frenchmen, Libel/Slander Against Lews Therin, the Little Sun Tzu in Emily's Brain, Uber Driver Perrin, and B. Sanderson's Inversion of Terry Pratchett's "Boots Theory."
Episode 279: A Creepily Slow Rendition of "Bad Romance"
Welcome to the Tower of Ghenjei! Is that David Bowie? For ch. 53–55, we talk about the Need to Be Told "No," Gay Old Dens, Helm's Deep Recruitment, the Finn Serving You-Know-What, Dune Box Mist, and Melodramatic Screaming.
Episode 280: Don't You Want to Rescue Me?
We finish up ToM with celebrations of Gawyn's Puka Shell Necklace, Pevara's Hut, the Tower of Ghenjei Locksmith, Graendal's Turbo Hell, and Olver's Mail Fraud, while condemning how ultimately pointless Moiraine's "death" was.